Never In Doubt (Don't Check My Comment History) (8/3/2024)

The players care. They give a rat’s backside. They want to chase, they want to play. You have Ashley Hansen before the game saying that everyone inside the club listens to outside noise - YOU SHOULD. YOU SHOULD. The coaching panel, the players, the board, LISTEN to us members. We’ve got 88,000, almost 90,000 members. You wanted us to sign up next year?! YOU BLOODY SHOWED US SOMETHING! YOU SHOWED US THE HEART! Last year we gave you the excuse, we had an injury-depleted midfield and we just missed out. We thought this year we’d go again. What’s the excuse? If you’re going to play for the coach, play for people like myself, who bust our balls every week to get there! Hard earned money! And you dish that up against BRISBANE! They were TOYED WITH! It’s an accomplishment for the navy blue and white, especially THE EMBLEM! THE EMBLEM!! YOU PLAYED FOR THAT! If you’re gonna play for it, PISS IN MY CLUB! GET IN!

- A Reddit-edited version of the EMBLEM copypasta.

Note: The following notes are live recaps of each quarter by yours truly. Though the game has been thouroughly spoiled by the previous paragraph, I hope they provide an alright perspective of my emotional stability during the course of this match.

Quarter One:

LMAO CARLTON ARE SHIT

Ultimate respect to the umpires for waiting for the Country Roads chorus to end before throwing it up. I love you umpires

That being said, this umpiring is................ interesting.

(that was a fucking trip on de koning last centre bounce fuck off)

Carlton just aren't pressuring the ball enough. We saw what happened when pressure happened but they aren't doing it enough

And brisabme are actually good yk

I was gonna say something but I forgot what. Uhh.

Is Docherty okay :(

HARRIS ANDREWS THERE U GO. HARRIS UR GOOD but pls stop

Charlie playing down back is such a mood

Tom you're doing great mate

I have eaten so many chips mmm yummy

Quarter Two:

tom de koning took at least two (2) conested marks fuck yeah mates (gn)

charlie cameron has decided no country roads this term (one out on the full, one (or was it two?) behinds

carlton still SUCK but they suck less. as mentioned earlier, they did put a lot more pressure on which is good

lots of messy, contested footy which i have decided i love. back and forth, back and forth, etc etc

WOOF saad

boyd is everywhere and doing alright

neale everywhere as always

no horrible injuries :) crippa got kneed in the knee but he seems to be alright. bailey got hit in the nuts lol

yeah hoping for some more carlton comeback lolol

Half Time Note;

I miss when Jarrod Berry had long hair.

Quarter Three

WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK

THE FUCKING FUCK

CARLTON ARE NO LONGER SHIT. I REPEAT: CARLTON ARE NO LONGER SHIT

what was it 47 point deficit reduced, and in fact turned into a one point lead at 3 qtr time?? holy mother of ruck jesus

to mde konin g :>

charlie cameron actually hates country roads sorry guys

CHARLIE CURNOW ON THE OTHER HAND!!!!

jack carroll is just a special little guy. man wears the number 16 and he plays good?? and for carlton no less??? ok you are now one of my guys have fun

midfield is midfielding well man. cripps is dominating as per usual but Man.

harris andrews losing it a little dfhskj

neale likes to fight and so do carlton 👍

uh what else can i say? miracle on grass but not really? up the blues? holy shit???

tom de koning :)

Quarter Four: NEVER IN FUCKING DOUBT. CAN YOU SMELL WhAT THE BLUES ARE COOKING. THE EMBLEM!!! THEY'RE COMING. CARN THE FUCKING BLUES

Actual Quarter Four Notes (Still unhinged, sorry)

MCKAY SAYS FUCK YOU TO MENTAL DEMONS, KICKS MATCH WINNING GOAL TO DEFEAT THE BRISBANE LIONS FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE LIKE 2013 OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT

THIS ALSO MEANS THE LIONS GABBA STREAK IS DEAD

NOT MY TIPS THOUGH. MY TIPS ARE DOING FINE

THE BLUES ARE NOT FUCKING WASHED NERDS!!

TOM DE KONING DID PRETTY GOOD CONSIDERING HE ALMOST FUCKED IT UP BY GIVING UP A HIGH CONTACT FREE KICK IN THE LAST MINUTE

HARRY MCKAY!!!!!! HOLY SHIT!!!

PATRICK CRIPPS IS LITERALLY THE NEXT MARK BLICAVS FUCKER CAN DO EVERYTHING, EVEN THE RUCKWORK

SO CAN ZAC WILLIAMS TOO (I THINK)

AS YOU CAN TELL I AM VERY HAPPY. I THINK I HAVE DISTURBED MY ENTIRE FAMILY THOUGH. whoops :(

OH MY GOD I WAS LIKE. SWEATING IN THE LAST QUARTER.

CHARLIE CAMERON FINALLY DECIDED HE WANTED US TO HEAR COUNTRY ROADS. THEN CHANNEL 7 DECIDED NO FUCK YOU ADS

I AM ONCE AGAIN ASKING FOR LESS ADS AND MORE QUALITY CROWD CONTENT IE. COUNTRY FUCKIN ROADS TAKE ME HOME TO THE PLACE I FUCKEN BELONG

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I HOPE KIDDY COLEMAN IS OKAY. SAW HIM IN CRUTCHES. SHIT

SAME WITH SAM DOCHERTY, BUT WITHOUT THE CRUTCHES. HOPE IT WAS JUST PRECAUTIONARY 💙

JACK CARROLL IS MY SPECIAL LITTLE GUY

SAME WITH JORDAN BOYD. MY BOY BOYD

AND OBVIOUSLY TOM DE KONING BUT WE'VE SAID A LOT ABOUT HIM. ACTUALLY WHY NOT MORE

HE DID SO GOOD!!!!!!!! AGAINST LITERALLY THE BIG O TOO WHICH IS INSANE. FUCK YEAH BOYYYYY

Carn the fucking Blus